


For the Love of You

by SolarMorrigan



Series: Solar's 007 Fest 2019 [26]
Category: James Bond (Craig movies)
Genre: 007 Fest, Angst, M/M, don't look at me it was a prompt fill I swear
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-26
Updated: 2019-07-26
Packaged: 2020-07-20 09:47:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,059
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19990099
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SolarMorrigan/pseuds/SolarMorrigan
Summary: Perhaps Bond hasn't learned his lesson at all. If he was given the opportunity to do it all again, he doesn't know if he would refuse.





	For the Love of You

**Author's Note:**

> Day 26! This one fills "Murder" on the [Angst Prompt Table](https://mi6cafe.wordpress.com/007-fest/007-fest-2019-prompt-tables/) and finishes the goddamn table! No more angst! (Well, maybe just a little, but nothing on the level I've _been_ doing.)
> 
> As ever, feel free to point out any typos, I appreciate it

It had occurred to Bond that it was a weakness. That he had been growing too reliant on it.

He just hadn’t cared.

-

_“There.” Q taped off the last bandage, pressing a gentle kiss to the skin above it. “Anything I missed?”_

_The answer, of course, was “no.” Q never missed a thing; he always made sure Bond was put back into fighting shape, even when Bond himself couldn’t be bothered._

_“I cut my lip last mission,” Bond told him instead, “and I don’t believe I received a kiss for that.”_

_Q smirked. “A grievous oversight. Please allow me to rectify it.” He leaned up and kissed Bond on the lips, slow and sweet. “Better?”_

_“I might need a few more. For the undue suffering caused by improper medical attention, you know,” Bond said._

_“You’re so full of shit.” Q snickered against Bond’s cheek, but kissed him again, anyway._

-

Maybe it had simply snuck up on him. Maybe Bond just hadn’t realized how goddamned compromised he was until he’d been forced to face it head-on.

-

_Just how Q had quickly deduced how much Bond appreciated closeness after sex (“You’re a cuddler,” Q had teased fondly), Bond didn’t want to know. He just enjoyed the way Q always allowed Bond to put his arms around him, always rested his head on Bond’s shoulder or his arms around Bond’s waist and would drift off that way._

_With his pointed chin planted on Bond’s chest, however, he didn’t seem to be falling asleep this time._

_“I must not have done my job properly if you can still think this hard,” Bond said, his eyes still closed._

_The response was not what he’d expected._

_“I love you.”_

_Though Bond was certain is face gave no reaction, Q was pressed right against him and must have felt the jump of tense muscles and the brief stilling of breath._

_“Well, I know I’m_ good _, but–”_

_“I’m serious,” Q said, his head lifting form Bond’s chest. “I love you.”_

_Bond opened his eyes to find Q staring down at him, intense and so, so sincere._

_No one had ever said it to Bond first._

_“I just wanted to make sure you knew,” Q continued after a moment of silence. “You don’t have to say it back or–”_

_“I love you, too.”_

_Q blinked. Slowly, he smiled. “You do?”_

_“I do,” Bond said. “Very much.”_

_“Well. Good.” Q’s grin spread until it could be called nothing but giddy and Bond followed through with the urge to kiss it off him, rolling until his body was blanketing Q’s in much the same way they’d ended up in bed in the first place._

-

He’d let Q get too far under his skin, and it had softened him. Bond recognizes that now.

-

_“It’s not all you are, you know,” Q said, snatching the bottle of whiskey from the table in front of Bond and taking a drink. “I don’t know if you think calling yourself a murderer as a joke helps you cope or something, but it’s one of your shittier coping mechanisms.”_

_Bond snatched the bottle back. “I kill people, Q. That’s what I do.”_

_“But it’s not what you_ are,” _Q said, bypassing the whiskey entirely to cup Bond’s face in his hands. “That’s not_ who _you are, James.”_

_Bond had no response, and instead grabbed the front of Q’s shirt and hauled him in for a hard kiss. Q kissed back, open and willing and just as intense, and rested his forehead against Bond’s when they pulled apart._

_“I know you, James,” he breathed, “and that’s_ not _you.”_

-

Bond had trusted Q. He had.

Regret is unprofessional, but Bond can’t help but look back.

-

_“Something important?” Bond asked, coming up behind Q where he stood at the counter to wrap his arms around Q’s waist and nuzzle into the side of his neck._

_It wasn’t unusual for Q to receive phone calls from work in the dead of night, but they rarely caused him to retreat to his office and close the door; those sorts of calls usually meant discussing a problem outside of Bond’s security clearance._

_Q shook his head, downing the last of his tea. It smelled like peppermint; he must have been on his way back to bed. “Friend with a project question. I didn’t want to keep you up.”_

_Thoughtful, but futile; Bond never slept well if Q was up and about in the house._

_“Seems like a rude time for a friend to call. It’s the middle of the bloody night,” Bond murmured._

_“Time zones know no manners, James,” Q quipped, putting his hands on Bond’s arms where they crossed over his middle. “Let’s go back to bed.”_

-

But perhaps Bond hasn’t learned his lesson. If he could do it all again, right through to the end, he doesn’t know if he would refuse.

-

_Q was sitting on the hotel bed, phone in hand and apparently harmless – deceptively so; Q was never harmless with electronics in his possession._

_Bond pulled his Walther, pointing unhesitatingly at Q. The lights glowed red._

_“You didn’t think you’d be able to use my own tech against me, did you?” Q asked, calm but for the way his knuckles were white around his phone._

_“Apparently someone did,” Bond replied, holstering the weapon._

_He didn’t need it. He was never harmless, full stop._

_“It doesn’t have to be like this,” Q said quietly. “We don’t have to do this.”_

_“Don’t be stupid, it doesn’t suit you,” Bond sneered. “You killed 008.”_

_“I didn’t pull the trigger.”_

_“You sold him out!”_

_“He was a reckless idiot. He would have dug his own grave sooner rather than later.”_

_“The same could be said of me. Where you going to give me away next?”_

_Q flinched._ “Never.”

_Bond believed him, and that was worse. “You’re a liability, Q. You know I can’t let you go.”_

_“I know. I love you, but you know I won’t go without a fight.”_

_A beat of silence._

_Two._

_“I know.”_

-

Bond has been a double-oh agent for longer than most. He’s seen and done things that would make people’s flesh crawl. He’s killed unflinchingly and has more blood on his hands than a butcher can claim.

Yet nothing has ever felt more like murder than Q’s last breath choking to a stop beneath Bond’s grip.

**Author's Note:**

> Also posted on [Tumblr](https://solarmorrigan.tumblr.com/post/186565627933/for-the-love-of-you-james-bond-00q-day-26), in case you'd prefer to yell at me there

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [quiet](https://archiveofourown.org/works/20072902) by [azure7539](https://archiveofourown.org/users/azure7539/pseuds/azure7539)




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